The hot plate slid out of my hands and fell to the concrete floor with a shattering crash. “Nooooooo!”, I moaned. You see, this hot plate was special. Important. My grandmother was a consummate artist and painted on many different surfaces and forms. One of her favorite things to do was to do china painting. She excelled at it, creating beautiful plates and “hot plates”. When she passed away, I inherited some of my favorite pieces. That hot plate had been in my kitchen through six moves and 30 + years of using it for my cooking spoons. She even initialed the back of each piece.
I loved that thing!
I gathered up the few pieces, amazed it didn’t shatter more, and carefully placed the pieces on my coffee station, thinking, “maybe I can repair it.” That was a month ago.
This week, I was cleaning up my kitchen and looked down at it and I sensed the Lord say, “Why do you insist on holding on to things that are broken?”
That made me pause. It’s true that I am a hopeless romantic for the positive, “I can fix this!” I was in a broken marriage for 25 years, but I kept praying and fasting for my miracle. “God can fix this!” And much like that hot plate, I put my broken marriage and heart on the Lord’s coffee station (I’m sure He has one…doesn’t everyone?). Like the hot plate, I would pass by the broken pieces, thinking, “Someday that will get fixed.”
Well, just like that hot plate, there came a day when I had to admit that it would not get fixed and I had to scoop up the pieces, toss them in the bin, and walk away.
I realize you don’t just toss a marriage away; but after years of trying to fix something that refuses to stay fixed, sometimes you must scoop up the pieces and lay them at the foot of the cross. Whether you wait there and contend for your miracle or are released to finalize the broken dream is between you and the Lord and no one except Him should give you the dustbin brush and scoop.
But why do we hang on to broken pieces? Even after the divorce is final, many struggle to clean up the shattered mess. Instead, they either sit in the fragmented remains like Job in his ashes, or they continue to pick up each piece and mourn its loss. Neither is healthy.
There is a time to grieve; but then there is a time to grab the brush and scoop, sweep up the remains and toss them in the bin at the foot of the cross. There are areas of your heart that God can only heal when you step away from the yearning for what is broken (read that again). And yet, some of us gaze longingly at our broken pieces, refusing to let go, and we miss the beauty of releasing the brokenness to the Master Healer.
Is it easy? No. But nothing life-changing is easy.
Does it hurt? Yes, for a while. But then comes the healing balm of Gilead and renewed freedom.
(Did you know that the Balm of Gilead was a real medicinal balm? Found only in Gilead, a region east of the Jordan River, it was a mixture of spices and herbs that had healing properties. Ok, history lesson over).
Here’s the part that people don’t always talk about. Sometimes the act of releasing must be done daily…sometimes HOURLY! We humans love to throw things away, then, in a moment of doubt, go back to the trash bin and sift through to find what was broken; only to set it back on the coffee bar.
It’s hard to release dreams. It’s painful to grieve the loss of a hope-filled relationship. It is the death of a future you fantasized about.
I know.
God promises to be near to us and our broken heart (The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart… Ps 34:18). He promises to heal and restore; but sometimes that restoration and healing is releasing what could have been and reaching for what will be. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up our [wounds. (Ps 147:3); but when our marriage isn’t healed, it is hard to let go. But we must let go to move into restoration.
Your rebuilding begins when you grab the dustpan and brush, scoop up the shattered remains of dreams and the future you hoped for, and toss it at the foot of the cross.
Need any extra encouragement or prayer? Reach out at Dana@redeemed-identity.com.